When in Doubt, Go Eight

When In Doubt Go 8

I’m heartbroken. Again. Leg broken. Again. I’m stubborn as hell and I like to figure things out, especially when it has to do with one of my greatest loves- running.

One of life's greatest joys is my early morning train routine-with my milky coffee in hand- as I drive to the place where I meet my best friends and training partners.

So, when something jeopardizes this- I get really scared.

I wouldn’t be so dramatic, but I have literally been dealing with one injury after the other(cause everything is connected!) since the OM trials in 2020.

I kept having faith and belief, hired a new coach, worked with the best nutritionists, and surrounded myself with books upon books upon articles not to mention so many athletes and great coachings - soaking it all up like a dried out sponge.

Still I'm back where I started.

I know so well that sometimes being an athlete means sacrificing health not enhancing it; but there does come a time when you start to wonder if maybe God has another plan for you, your body and your brain.

Can I trust his plan for me? This plan is messy, sticky, yet beautiful. This plan is ego bruising!

BUT, I don't have to know where this challenge will lead me, who I will meet, or what I will learn about myself that I can hope to share with others as a friend, trainer, and coach.

There comes a time when a person’s plan takes a pivot. I don't want to pivot. Remember, I'm stubborn. Ha. So, maybe I just take it day by day. And trust him.

And, remind myself of my goal: To run at the highest AND healthiest level. Wow, that’s a mouthful.

That sounds impossible right now- which means that goal is darn perfect for ME! I like hard. Hard is my thing!

So one of my best, very fast friends is training for Grandma’s Marathon in June; all I wish is to train hard by her side- shoulder to shoulder- literally some of the most joyful moments in my life are on long or hard runs chatting away about what we are both reading or writing about, what the day will brings, or just listen to each other’s breaths and steps-We run loops in Forest park, in around around STL while we share gus and slurp rom water fountains.

I must tell you, this friend is very talented with so much potential; she has not even come close to peaking. Seriously, she’s scary fit!! This gal was not always a runner but an ice hockey player. Growing up she would watch the boys play and soon began playing along side of them; bumping elbows I am sure.

When she first took to the sport of marathoning, although successful at races, she spent a few years not realizing how incredibly talented she was, and is only just now realizing this obvious fact. For the past few months, and in the next fews months into years, my dear friend will be on her way to some amazing life moments. I am gitty imagining this due to all the nostalgic feelings of all these moments I was blessed to experience in the past 15 years of real competitive running.

And now, It’s her turn. And I can’t tell you how happy I feel thinking of her smile and satisfaction from working hard and reaching heights that only come to those who show up and work day after day while still attending to recovery, healing, and health. She deserves all the moments with me as her biggest cheerleader and supporter.

Just a few days ago at the Go! Pre-Race ceremony, I asked her about another one of our running girl friends and how her running and wellness were progressing. Our mentioned friend was once an olympian and just recovered from her 2nd hip surgery.

My friend reported that this Olymam was finally doing so very well and further had a new perspective on her running capabilities and career: all she desires from her running life now is a swift and smooth 8 miler.

The way my friend said this to me was very calm, nonchalant and non judgemental. And in a smooth and upbeat manner, she transitioned to sharing about their upcoming adventures to CO and Banf together - a trip not dictated by a running race or any other obligation- just a trip with two great friends.

The message hit me hard and almost brought tears to my eyes as I realized something so very simple: Love is love.

It does not discriminate, it does not dictate, it does not judge. Love is just love.

And so, with this 8 billionth injury in the past few years, I can feel safe and enraptured by the idea that if I love something and it loves me too- it will always be there for me. Maybe not in the capacity my human brain conceptualized over the past year, but with a new perspective.

Sorta reminds me of the Mizzou Cross days- one of our teammates had a big banner in her loft “when in doubt go 8[miles].”

yah know, 8 sounds just right. 8 starts a day off right. 8 is enough time to see your friends' beautiful faces, share stories, and still get home to see your kids, hubs, and pups rise and shine before a big day of whatever with the family.

I’m in doubt. Maybe I should go to 8.

To end, a person can’t have more information than I have in their brain about training theory, elite and recreational running experiences, and my own success in this sport that I’ve been married to- for longer than my actual husband I might add. God doesn’t care about all that though.

My body is just not cooperating with the demands I am putting on it- the program has been progressive, safe even, yet I keep ending up in the same place. Maybe it’s time to make some changes.

Tim Noakes says a person has an average of 10 solid competitive running years in them as well, well you know, I;ve taken more than my share of glory.

I have been to this place before and it really isn't getting any easier. The only focus that can ease my hunger for this sport is through coaching others. The joy in my heart and the passion in making the very best decisions to help others reach their goals is the ultimate joy for me.